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Posts tagged ‘conflict’

Jun 11

3 Comments

Resurrection

 

Some day we will all find what we are looking for. Or maybe we won’t. Maybe we will find something much greater than that. – Anonymous

Let the ruins come to life. – Joel Houston

 

Two and a half years ago, I stared at a computer screen and gripped a scrap piece of paper in my hands.

Should I? Shouldn’t I? 

Then:

Does it even matter?

I was 31;

three years into my relationship with leukemia,

and not too many more into my relationship with motherhood.

I struggled to juggle

kids who were no longer toddlers, not quite school-aged children,

with a job I mostly loved, sometimes hated.

I’d graduated from one phase of life

– here is where we have children –

to one I never thought I’d see

– here is where we try to keep me alive so I can raise those children.

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Nov 12

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Brave

Security is mostly a superstition. It does not exist in nature, nor do the children of men as a whole experience it. Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run than outright exposure. Life is either a daring adventure, or nothing. – Helen Keller

Some days, I just don’t know what I’d do without my friends.

Well, maybe I do. Maybe I don’t want to think about it. Maybe I don’t want you guys to know that. Maybe there’s a tiny part of us that is unfit for any other human to know, see, or understand,

even those we trust the most.

I firmly believe in the power of community.

Nothing hard is conquered in isolation. Nothing painful is endured so well as within a safe community.

But even the safest community can be – at times – dangerous.

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Dec 19

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The Best Thing I did Last Christmas

Forgiveness is a virtue of the brave. – Indira Ghandi

The best thing I did last Christmas had nothing to do with family gatherings, food, music, lights… or what was under the tree.

In fact, it wasn’t public at all.

Last Christmas – after a particularly painful conversation with someone I wasn’t sure I could trust – I realized I was carrying something… heavy. Without trying, I’d found myself in… let’s call it tension, with a few key people  – and one of them called me out.

I didn’t know where the tension came from. Perhaps it was gradual, like a stack of tiny rocks I’d collected over the few years I’d known these people. I thought I’d stuffed it away, or even ‘dealt with it,’ and yet here I was, less than a week from Christmas, and the rocks had spilled all over the main part of my life.

There was no escaping it.

And I knew I had a choice: continue in the tension, try to pretend it wasn’t there, or try and diffuse it.

Those of you who’ve ever been married know that the best way to escalate a fight is to: 1) defend yourself, or 2) leave.

The only way to diffuse it?

Swallow your pride, stay in place, and try to understand the other person. Read more

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